


From One to Eternity

by EllaStorm



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Drug Withdrawal, M/M, h/c, unnecessary amounts of maths
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-29
Updated: 2015-09-29
Packaged: 2018-04-24 01:08:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4899685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EllaStorm/pseuds/EllaStorm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reid tries to count to eternity in Fibonacci numbers. Morgan breaks into his flat with a spare key. They both need a while to get it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	From One to Eternity

_144…233…377_

The world kept stretching around the edges, only to slowly twist back, like a buggy camera lens. Reid wrapped the covers tighter around himself, but even three of them couldn’t keep the cold from creeping in under his skin, right into his bones.

 

_377…610…987_

Fibonacci. Easy. Logical. The sum of two numbers always made another number, a bigger one. From one to eternity.

 

_987…1597…2584_

Something to hold on to.

 

_2584…_

_It’s just a chemical reaction. Neurotransmitters sending wrong messages. Synapses getting spammed with misguided alarm signals. You don’t need it. Focus._

 

_FOCUS._

_2584… what’s the next one? 41- 418----- Fuck._

_1…1…2…3…5…8…13…21…_

The ring of the doorbell was earsplitting. Reid curled in on himself.

 

_21…34…55…89…_

“Reid?”

 

The voice that sounded half-loud through the apartment seemed vaguely familiar. Reid tried to recollect where he knew it from.

 

“You haven’t been answering your phone.”

 

_That’s Morgan._

“Reid, I know you’re in there. And –“ The voice hesitated. “And I know what’s up. Just let me in. Please.”

 

Reid didn’t move.

 

Half a minute passed.

 

“Okay, genius. I’m not saying that you’re not very good at hiding your spare key. What I’m saying is.” Morgan cleared his voice. “I found your spare key. And, I’m worried about you. So, I’m gonna come in now, alright? Don’t shoot me.”

 

Despite himself, Reid chuckled. Or, rather, tried to. The only sound his throat seemed capable of producing was sort of a raspy cough.

 

The sound of the key turning in the lock echoed through the room. Then, steps coming closer, the weight of them making the wooden floorboards creak.

 

“Reid?”

 

The voice was directly next to him now. And then a warm, dry hand touched Reid’s forehead.

 

“Dammit, kid. You look like death warmed over. And you feel like ice water.”

 

Reid turned his head just slightly, until he could make out about half of a well known, frowning face in his right field of vision.

 

“More like –“ His voice creaked just as much as the floorboards earlier. “Death tossed in the microwave for twenty seconds.”

 

“Do you want me to call an ambulance?”, Morgan asked.

 

“No, no, nonono. They’re just-“ The world was spinning out of control again; and Reid closed his eyes until it stopped. “They’re just going to give me more drugs” he managed. “Don’t really need that.”

 

“Okay. No ambulance. But at least let me get you some water.”

 

Reid nodded sluggishly, slowly blinking his eyes open again.

 

Water sounded good.

 

 

***

 

 

When Morgan returned with the promised glass of water, Reid had accomplished moving into a sitting position. His vision was still distorting from time to time, but the shaking of his limbs had gotten lighter, and he felt about half a degree less cold. _Withdrawal symptoms have been observed to be worst in the first 72 hours after last intake, but can be experienced intensely for up to 14 days, depending on the dosage and consistency of opioid usage._

Reid was 6 days and 22 hours in. _That’s 7 days and 2 hours more to go. Which equals - how many Fibonacci-numbers to count?_

“Hey”, Morgan interrupted his thoughts, and sat down on the edge of the bed. He was clad in jeans and a casual, grey v-neck. No jacket. No gun. This was not an official visit.

 

“Do the others know you’re here?”, Reid asked the obvious question, after taking a sip of water.

 

“No. Actually – I’m not sure how much they know about your…condition. Gideon is suspecting, of course, and you can’t really hide anything from Hotch, but JJ, Prentiss and Garcia are oblivious by choice, I suppose. They’d all come running the instant you asked for help, no doubt. But – they believe that, if you’re really in need, you’ll let them know. That’s why they’re leaving well enough alone for now.”

 

“So what about you? Showing up at my door and using my spare key to break in doesn’t really speak for you following that example.”

 

“I’m not here to help you. I’m here to make sure you’re alright”, Morgan gave back. Which, really, didn’t answer Reid’s question. At all.

 

He chose not to comment on his observation, though, and drained the rest of his water in five gulps, before setting the empty glass down on the nightstand. Then he turned to Morgan, who was still watching him.

 

“Are you going to sit here for the rest of the evening, making sure I’m alright?”, he asked, genuinely curious.

 

Morgan flinched, like he had not expected getting talked to that soon. “I’m – look, I was worried. I am worried” he corrected himself. “I’m not trying to monitor you. Or examine your physical fitness. Or – anything crazy like that. I was just-“ He broke off.

 

Reid managed a crooked smile. “Worried. I know. But don’t you think there’s a better way to spend your evening than bringing me water and watching me work my way through withdrawal symptoms? I’m a little hard on the eyes at the moment.”

 

Morgan’s brows furled in on themselves. “Give yourself a break. You’re making this sound like it’s your fault, when it clearly isn’t. This is something that happened _to_ you, not something you chose for yourself.” His gaze softened a little. “And you’re not hard on the eyes. Even though – not gonna lie, you could use a shower.”

 

Reid laughed half-heartedly. “On my way”, he replied, and rose to his feet – a tad too fast as he found out immediately after. He would probably have plunged straight to the floor, face first, had Morgan not seen it coming and caught him in a firm grip around his waist.

 

“Slowly, pretty boy. Slowly. Don’t make me drive you to the emergency room.”

 

“I’m fine”, Reid lied, waiting for his vision to stop going haywire on him.

 

“Of course you are. Reid, there is no way I’m letting you into the shower like that.”

 

“I’m not a little kid, I can handle myself.”

 

“Clearly.”

 

Reid mustered up all his strength to glare at him. “So, what are you suggesting?”

 

“I’m coming with you.”

 

For a moment, Reid was completely sure that his withdrawal-shaken nervous system had finally snapped, and chosen to betray him with auditory hallucinations.

 

“What?”

 

“I’m coming with you”, Morgan repeated, firmly. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to pry. I’ll just be there in case you’re trying to get personally acquainted to the floor again.”

 

Reid didn’t much approve of this plan, but he didn’t offer any resistance either, as Morgan manhandled him into the bathroom. Partly, because he didn’t have the strength to do so, and partly because he was genuinely glad to have Morgan there to look after him, even though he’d never admit it.

 

They didn’t talk as he stripped off his clothes and slipped into the shower, while Morgan kept his promise and averted his gaze.

 

The hot water on Reid’s chilly skin felt like heaven. As he closed his eyes, leaning back under the spray, his cramped muscles finally relaxed for a few precious minutes.

 

That was, until his legs gave out and his vision went black.

 

 

***

 

 

When he came to, he was sitting on the floor of the shower, his back leaned against the still-warm tiles. The water was off, and big hands were cradling his face. Well, one hand. The other kept lightly slapping his cheek, emphasised by an insistent voice calling his name. “Reid! REID!”

 

“I’m not deaf”, Reid said, faintly. “Just dizzy.” He gave the agent the once-over. “You look like you showered with your clothes on.”

 

“That’s ‘cause I just did.” Morgan countered, relief in his voice.

 

Reid smiled at him. “Thank you.”

 

“Nothing to thank me for”, Morgan replied. His hands were still on Reid’s face, as if to reassure himself that he was really back.

 

It felt nice.

 

Real.

 

 

***

 

 

Somehow, half-walking by himself, half-dragged by Morgan, Reid made it back to his bedroom, put on some fresh clothes, and cocooned himself in his three blankets.

 

“Do you want me to leave?”, Morgan asked.

 

“I don’t want to ruin your evening.”

 

The agent nodded. “I’m in the living room, if you need me. Try to get some sleep, pretty boy.”

 

He was already halfway out of the room, when Reid said. “I’m sorry for – this mess. You shouldn’t have to. You know. Do all that.”

 

Morgan blinked, came back, and sat down on the edge of Reid’s bed. “Listen, Spencer. I’m only saying this once, and I want you to understand it, okay?” His eyes didn’t leave Reid’s for a second as he spoke. “I’m here, because I want to be. Not because I feel guilty, or responsible, or because you somehow tricked me into it. I’m here for you, and I’m not going to leave before you’re strong enough to physically kick me out.”

 

“Then you’ll have to stay for a long time”, Reid said. He couldn’t look away, the phantom touch of Morgan’s hands still on the sides of his face.

 

“Would that be so bad?”

 

The question remained unanswered between them, stretching into eternity, like a row of natural numbers.

 

_144…233…377…610…987…_

Reid stopped counting then, bridged the gap between them, and laid his lips on Morgan’s.

 

It was crazy, and thoughtless, and completely overdue, like it should have happened yesterday, or this morning, or at least ten minutes earlier in the shower, but it was happening now, and Reid didn’t complain, because it felt right and good to kiss Morgan, and be kissed back by him, warm skin under his fingers, and equally warm, strong hands on his back.

 

Easy.

 

Logical.

 

Like the sum of two numbers, that always made another number, a bigger one.

 

Something to hold on to.

**Author's Note:**

> Since the Criminal Minds S11 premiere is IMMINENT, I needed to get this out. Yes, I watched "Revelations" again. Yes, I cried about Spencer Reid. Don't we all?


End file.
